Remembering the Past...Beginning a new future

July 15th would have been our 8th wedding anniversary. So many happy memories surround this day and time of year. We had an amazing wedding surrounded by all of the people we love so dearly. I remember being just giddy on this day. I could hardly wait for Hank to pronounce us husband and wife. All of the planning up to this day didn't even matter anymore. I didn't care how things looked or where people stood...I just wanted to be married to this amazing man standing by my side. Honestly, I tried to listen to all that was said, but it was hard to concentrate. (It was a good thing we had it all recorded on a video to watch later!) :-)

We had SO much fun at the reception and were enjoying our friends and each other for hours into the night. Finally, my mom had to come up and tell us that people were ready to leave, but were waiting on us! We just had wanted to soak in the biggest party of our lives here on earth as much as we could. When we did get away, it was SO fun to go away and realize that we now were married!

It took us a while to soak in the fact that we were married! We started off our honeymoon slow...staying in KC and just relaxing and resting after the big production. We stayed there Sat. and Sun. night and flew out on Monday morning. Rich had planned the whole thing and surprised me with the details! I didn't have any idea where we were going until we flew into Newark, NJ. It was then that I figured out we must be going to Maine. I was SO excited. When we had first been dating, I had seen slides of Maine (where Rich was born) and it was so beautiful. My favorite part was that it had the ocean AND the mountains...the best of both worlds! I had said, "I hope to go there someday!" and here I was. We stayed in a bed & breakfast - Long Lake Inn. We were almost the only people there and the older couple that ran it were so sweet to us! We went on a boat ride, picked wild blueberries, raspberries, and took hikes all around. We drove along the shore and went to the beach---a little cold, but still took a dip in the ocean! It was a perfect beginning to spending the rest of our lives together.

I have SO many amazing memories to fill the next 7 years, but I know that now I need to concentrate on making NEW memories as well. I'm so thankful that I will always have a part of Rich in my life through not only memories, but our precious son, Ethan!

For our anniversary, I decided to take Ethan to the Great Wolf Lodge. Rich and I had talked about how we would like to take our kids there someday. Ethan LOVES water and I knew this would be a good place to go...somewhere away from home. We had a GREAT time! Aunt Holly joined us for the evening and night and Uncle "Buff" joined us for the evening as well. It was not only a good distraction, but I had FUN!! I loved playing in the water and soaking up some sun while watching Ethan smile, laugh, and run through the fountains and speed down the slides. I think it is going to become an annual tradition.

We spent the next night at my sister, Sarah's house. They were away for the evening and so Ethan and I went to a nearby park and played and then, since we were both exhausted from playing in the sun and water for the past 24 hours, went to bed early. We spent the next day at Wonderscope- A children's museum. It was really a great mini vacation! It was nice to know that I could still go on vacations and enjoy some time away even if it was just with Ethan.

There are some days that I think, "I can do this single-mom thing". I KNOW that in Christ I can do ALL things. For that, I am so very thankful!! There are other moments that I am still a bit overwhelmed knowing that I am 100% responsible for caring for my son and for helping him to grow into the man that God desires him to be. I just read the other day about how important it is for boys to hear their father's voices reading to them because men read differently AND that having it modeled before them by both their mothers and their fathers helps children to grow up with a love for reading. Sigh!! I really should stop reading so much!! :-) Rich loved to read, but I was always reading informational material and how-to books. He would come home from work and I would share something and he would say, "Where did you read that?" with a smile. I think the only book that I can trust 100% with my heart is God's Word. I need to continue to lay my fears and hopes for my future at His feet!!

He has proven to me that the world doesn't know it all!! Everything I read about being a widow said that many of your friends would leave you b/c they wouldn't know what to say or how to relate to you any more. It also says that they will start to stop "being there for you" over time. Well, God has proven that statistic to be wrong in my life!! I have been surrounded by friends like never before in my life. I STILL receive cards, prayers, emails, and even financial gifts. God IS faithful and will provide for my needs. Yes, maybe it is not as much as on Aug. 8th or 9th of 2007, but it is as much as I need in the moment at JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT!!

Thank you, God, for continuing to be my everything! One of my favorite verses that I have written at the front of my prayer journal was sent to me in card just this week...
"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him" (I Cor. 2:9)

Another encouraging card I received this week had this verse...
"I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build you up again." (Jer. 31:3)

I am holding on to these hopes in my life!!

"Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt His name together. I sought the Lord and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him, and He delivers them. Taste and see that the Lord is good; Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him." (Psalm 34: 3,4, 7,8)
The Pslams will continue to give me great comfort and rest each night. I can't go to bed without reading one of them!!